My Halloween story for you…

So I’ve gotten pretty excited about Halloween.  Besides our neighbors to the left and right, we are the only house “decorated” for the occasion.  I was even planning a pumpkin carving party until time got away from me and I hadn’t sent out invitations.  Regardless, I wanted to get into the festivities and carve pumpkins even if it was just Craig, Taylor and I.  Last year Uncle Chris make quite an impressive pumpkin carving  and I was excited to try my hand at it. 

What I thought would be a fun family evening turned out to be me carving three pumpkins while Taylor and Craig played blocks (actually Craig did carve one of them but it was the easiest one, so….) Whatever.  The pumpkins turned out awesome!  I wish I had pictures to show you.  We carved a bat silhouette for Taylor, a scary face for mine, and a window scene with a silhouetted cat, jack-o-lantern and a spider for Craig’s pumpkin.  Really cool!

But here’s where the other side of the story comes in.  And I’m gonna call it the “Halloween” side of the story….

We were excited to put our Jack-o-lanterns on display, so we put them outside and lit them for all the neighborhood to see.  Little did we know there were prying eyes.  After a couple of hours, I blew out the candles and set the pumpkins by our front door.  When it was time to go to bed, I checked the outside again to make sure lights were off and that I had indeed blown out the candles on our magnificent pumpkins (also, I’m not going to lie to you, I wanted to check our works of art again…).  When I opened the blinds to peek out the front window, I saw this….

doesthatpumpkintastegood?

Its a Javelina.  At my door.  Eating my pumpkin.  The BEST pumpkin that took me about an hour an a half to complete!  Now if any of you have seen the Princess Bride, you may be familiar with ROUS’ (rodents of unusual size)–which was (not loosely) based on the Javelina.

 So yes.  I DID take the picture through the window.  That’s why the picture is not that great.  OK?  And if any of you want to make fun of me…I’m fine with that.  Seriously, take a good look at these rodents, they are disgusting…and also, I hear they get aggressive when they’re startled…I wasn’t opening that door. 

So you can imagine how my heart jumped to my throat when I peeked through the blinds and saw that Javelina looking at my door like he was planning on coming in for a while. Naturally, my eyes were so fixed on this rodent, which was so close, that I didn’t realize there was a second one (pictured above eating pumpkin)—even CLOSER.  He was standing so close to the window that I didn’t even see him at first and it was only when he lifted his head to take a break from his gorging that I came nose to nose with this second.  Yikes again! So we watched these guys hang out on our front doorstep and eat pumpkin for about five minutes (I wasn’t too comfortable slipping off to bed while two Javelina were hanging outside my door).  

And here’s where the story takes a sinister twist.  We realized that the Javelina weren’t just wild “ROUS'” on a pumpkin raid.  Their attack was much more calculated.  For they hadn’t just randomly taken bites from the entire pumpkin, but had carefully gnawed only the carvings from each of my three Jack-o-lanterns. It was Halloween tricking of the meanest kind! Pure maliciousness!  And their ruthlessness did not stop there.  Among the spoils of their banquet, just feet from their spying audience, they proceeded to, excuse the expression, “do the deed” on our doorstep! Then those smug, SMUG Javelinas, with their full bellies and their satisfied libidos slowly wandered off into the night surely looking for more Halloween victims to taunt…

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WATCH YOUR PUMPKINS AND HAVE A HAPPY HALLOWEEN!

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